The Silver Play Button

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Morning Pages

10.25.2016 11:23am

Definitely not the morning anymore, but I really wanted to write about this for anyone who wanted to hear about it, and for me to have something to look back on later.

Yesterday, I finally received my Sliver Play Button from YouTube. In case you aren’t familiar with this, it’s an award given to YouTube creators who surpass 100,000 subscribers. A golden version is awarded to those who surpass a million, and a diamond one to those who surpass ten million. Obviously, I’ve got quite a long way to go before I can even think about the gold.

I had been waiting on this thing for months. I hit 100k way back in April or so, and it’s nearly November now.

Reaching 100k was an odd experience to me. I didn’t feel that I had grown that much as a content creator, yet my numbers were saying otherwise. I was, of course, very happy and grateful when this happened to me, but it left me feeling slightly wrong in a way. I felt almost like I didn’t deserve it.

To be completely honest, when I first started the channel, my ultimate goal was 10,000 subscribers, which took me nine months to achieve. At that point, the goal changed to 100k–but did I think I could actually do it? Not really. Not anytime soon, anyway.

Like I said, when I did hit the 100k mark, something felt off. I couldn’t exactly process what had happened. I knew I was supposed to be happy, but it just wasn’t there. Having the award in front of you really does change things. I felt like I officially made 100k yesterday, despite the fact that I now stand at nearly 174k, and I’ve somehow managed to almost double what my award was for.

When the box came in, I felt like a child on Christmas morning, and I really mean that. I don’t think I’ve ever opened mail so quickly in my life. It came in a standard cardboard box, and inside was a black YouTube box; a very sleek-looking box that just screamed “legit” and reduced me to a babbling teenager, spouting out Millennial slang. I did, in fact, record this–but my excessive use of “like” was way too annoying for me to make public. So, I will not be posting that video. I think it’s better off being kept for myself anyway. It was a private little moment where I felt genuine joy, and maybe the internet didn’t need to be in on it this time.

Once I saw the YouTube box, I couldn’t stop smiling, and once I opened that box and actually saw my award, I couldn’t stop laughing. Why? I have no idea. There was just this wave of laughter that I couldn’t hold back. I guess, there was something funny about how surreal this whole thing is. How the heck did I end up doing this for a living? Maybe that isn’t important. The important thing is that I enjoy these moments as they come.

No matter how this YouTube things ends, I like knowing the fact that I at least gave it a shot. And no, this is not me quitting. I’ll still be around.

The award is now hanging in my hallway, and I still haven’t fully taken it in yet. This morning, it sort of startled me, but in a good way. Eight more of those to go until I get the next button.

Final thoughts: If you want to try YouTube, give it a shot. You never know what could come from it. Also, pizza sounds pretty great right now.

Have a great day.

-Reign

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